Why You Should Include Your Young Adult Children in Estate Planning Conversations

While we all know the critical role estate planning can play in this process, involving young adult children in such matters is often overlooked. Including them in your estate planning conversations and being transparent about their potential inheritance can provide great benefits for your family’s future.

Unfortunately, many families aren’t aware of the pitfalls of not communicating their estate plans with family members. According to a recent survey, 34% of people between the ages of 35 and 54 have never discussed estate planning with anyone.¹ Nearly half (46%) of people who had been named the executor of a will were not aware they had been chosen and according to Cambridge Trust, more than half (52%) don’t know where their parents store their estate planning documents.²

Talking about estate planning doesn’t have to be somber or intimidating. With the right approach, it can be an empowering and meaningful conversation. It would also be good to consider inviting your financial advisor or estate attorney.

The agenda for the meeting can be simple and straightforward:

• Your goals for the estate
• Overview of your estate plan
• Roles and responsibilities
• Inheritance and asset distribution expectations
• Q&A, feedback and next steps

Share as much as you feel comfortable disclosing, but also enough to make the conversation meaningful. Discuss the location of important documents, contact information, and access instructions on items such as:

• Most recent will(s), trust(s), powers of attorney, health care directives
• Birth and marriage certificates, Social Security cards, licenses, titles or other proofs of ownership
• Names and contact information for financial providers, advisors, doctors, lawyers, accountants, as well as appropriate friends and family members
• List of social media and other online accounts, along with usernames and passwords

Talking about inheritance and estate plans can equip your children with the knowledge and tools to make sound financial decisions. It can also prevent future conflicts. One of the leading causes of family disputes after the death of a loved one is unclear or undisclosed estate plans.

Estate planning is about more than dividing assets—it is also an opportunity to pass along your values and legacy objectives. Maybe you wish to support a charitable cause, continue funding a family vacation home, or ensure that a grandchild's education is covered. Including children in this process may even increase their interest in philanthropy or inspire them to carry on family traditions with even deeper purpose.

As life progresses and circumstances change, estate plans should be reviewed regularly. Having open channels of communication with your children ensures the plan will continue to evolve in terms of alignment with family needs and priorities.

Conclusion

Initiating estate planning conversations with your children may feel uncomfortable at first, but the benefits far outweigh any awkwardness. Transparency fosters trust, and most importantly, it turns estate planning from a solitary act into a collaborative process—one that honors the legacy you’ve built and the values you hold close. If you're not sure how to begin the conversation, or would like to discuss how to ensure your estate plan is optimized to carry your legacy forward, please feel free to reach out.

Thanks for reading.

¹ justvanilla.com, July 26, 2024 https://www.justvanilla.com/blog/estate-planning-statistics-and-facts-you-need-to-know
² Cambridge Trust, February 16, 2022 https://www.cambridgetrust.com/getmedia/f6d7e00f-261b-4cb0-a915-23fef435edbb/Q1-Client-Update-2022-Bridging-the-Gap.pdf